Coping with a low sex drive

Cancer and its treatment can make you lose interest in having sex.

Your sex drive might be lower because of:

• tiredness (fatigue)

• anxiety about having cancer

• loss of confidence and self esteem

• side effects from other treatments such as cancer drugs

• changes in hormone levels

Ideas for coping

Many of these problems will disappear once your treatment finishes. And your desire for sex will go back to normal. But it may take a bit of time, so don’t worry too much if you don’t feel like having sex for a while.

If you’re in a relationship it will be important to talk about this with your partner. Sometimes if you lose your interest in sex it stops you making the effort to enjoy other physical contact with your partner. This can be very difficult for you both.

Even though you don’t feel like having sex, it doesn’t mean you can’t still enjoy kissing, cuddling and being close to your partner. Kissing and touching can be very comforting and relaxing. As long as you are both clear about how far you’re expecting to go.

It may be helpful, or necessary, to put intercourse on hold for a while. Focus on showing each other affection in other ways. Some people find that while they don’t feel like having sex, once they become physical with a partner or pleasure themselves, they become aroused. It can help to be open to this. It might also help to talk things through with a counsellor or therapist.

Find out about talking about your sexuality and sex life