Sex and cancer for partners

You may be wondering how to deal with any changes in your sex life if your partner has cancer. You may also worry about issues around communication, supporting your partner or contraception. There are different ways to help you cope with these issues such as counselling.

Radiotherapy

If your partner is having ​external radiotherapy​ treatment it is fine to have intercourse if you both want to.

Prostate cancer 

If your partner has had ​brachytherapy​ for prostate cancer they should use condoms:

• during intercourse and

• for the first month after treatment

This applies to vaginal, anal or oral sex. Very rarely a radiotherapy seed in the prostate gland gets misplaced and might be found in the semen.

Pelvic radiotherapy in women 

Your partner might not feel like having sex for a while during and after pelvic radiotherapy. The skin inside the vagina will be fragile, and might break down. This increases the risk of infection.

More information and support

Many problems with sex after cancer will get better with time and a little patience. There is help available for you. Remember problems with sex are very common, even for people who do not have cancer. They are just not always talked about much.

You might want to talk through how you feel. Talking to a counsellor or sex therapist can help you to find ways of overcoming difficulties. You can go alone or with your partner. It might be useful to talk things through as a couple, if you can.

Find out more about counselling organisations

Get more information on resources and support around sexuality and cancer